mm, hi.
It's 3 in the afternoon, and I have just had my morning shower.
Can you say, "Oink" ?
Hahah.

I've been sleeping in way too much these past few days, regardless of how early I sleep the night before. Last night wasn't a good night, I couldn't sleep for yonks, honest. Was up till about 3, tossing and turning. Kept getting calls from stupid people who have not heard of sleeping, very very annoyering.
Am beside myself with boredom, and I can't be arsed to find entertainment. I want a choc chip cookie, yummy yummy.
Been raining like crazy these past few days, and I've been tempted each and every time to just go run around, or just lay down in the rain, but this damn fever is holding me back. I despise how I always get sick during the holidays.
Chello is coming back on the 6th (cue hallelujah chorus), finally some salvation.
Regret not taking Shah and Zhaffy up on their offers to go out. My boredom is result of the fact that I can't be bothered to get my fatarse off this damn couch, and do something productive.
Well besides paying for lung cancer, it's about the only thing I have energy for now.
Oh, innocent youth.

I'm bored.
So I shall make random posts about the random conversations I have;

We were at the mamak in Gasing, and there was this poster advertising Viagra Tea.
Me : I wanna try that !
Kane : what, you have a peeenis now is it ?
Me : Maybe after drinking that I will. *smiles.
Kane : *dies laughing.
Me : No, foreal ! Maybe it'll grow out of my belly button ! Or my ears ! Whoa !
Kane : Manda, what is wrong with you ?
Me : *dies laughing*
Kane : Huh ?
Me : I laughed so hard, I think my penis fell outta my belly button.
Kane : Aiyoooo.

Talking to Pixie.
Me : I dare you la, hah.
Pixie : Oh it's onnnnnnnnnnnn. It's on like Jaafar !
Me : What ?!
Pixie : I'm so cool.
Me : OMG. I GET IT. TRIX ! You are beyond lame.
Pixie : No, I'm just too much for you to handle. Pfft.

Talking to Yew Wing.
Me : Mr.Tencent !
Yew Wing : Boogermonkey !
Me : I'm so bored la.
Yew Wing : Sing something la.
Me : abcdefghijklmonpqrstuvwxyz.
Yew Wing : lmnop la !
Me : *after a few seconds* Yea ah...
Yew Wing : *dies laughing*

My Bitchy Voman.

Chinia : How come you're not coming to Kuching ?
Me : Cos my Momma said that you're Momma ain't gonna be there during the holidays, cos she's going somewhere. As usual.
Chinia : My mom's only going on the 24th. When are the holidays ?
Me : 15th.
Chinia : That means she'll be here. Why ain't your Momma coming ?!
Me : I don't know. Maybe she don't know how to count.

Chinia : *giggles.
Me : *sluuurrrp.
Chinia : *stops laughing. Whoa, what the hell was that, dude ?
Me : My juicebox.
Chinia : I like juice.
Me : Oh, I like you toooo ! Wow, we have alot in common. I like you, and you like me, and you like you, and I like m-
Chinia : I didn't say I like you. I said I liked juice.
*both of us burst out laughing*
Me : I knew thaaat.

Chinia : What did you say ?
Me : *giggles.
Chinia : *giggles.
Me : *giggles.
Chinia : What were we talking bout ?
Me : I don't know...

Me : Hey Chinia ?
Chinia : Yea ?
Me : STUMPED ! *dies laughing.

Me : *tells some random story.
Chinia : Dickheaaad.
Me : How's your dad treating you.
Chinia : Mm, dickheaad.
Me : Psh, dickheaaaaad.

Yes, I have blond roots. Sue me lah.

I didn't have anything better to do with myself the other day, so I went through all my drawers in search of something to amuse me. Instead, I found all sorts of stuff that brought up so many memories. From 06 up to now.
Feb o6, all the drama, and what happened behind closed doors ?
Then I found the card that she made me. I knew I still had it, but I just hadn't looked through it in a long time.
Talk about nostalgia.
I do miss how some things were, but if i could go back and change anything, I honestly don't know if I would, but that's just me.

Moving on, I think I've been jumping headfirst into too many situations this year. I think I've gotten past that, and I've realised that I've wasted too much time on the irrelevant. I'm cutting lose on the things that aren't going anywhere, on the emotional bullshit that I don't need or want. Everything's been making me think lately, and I've probably over analyzed every single detail over and over again. I've misread signals, and I've read too much into what I thought was real.
It's funny how there's such a fine line between reality and imagination, and I now realise, that all along, I've just been believing in something that wasn't really there in the first place. Disappointing as it sounds, I know I'll bounce back, maybe not as easily as before, but I could always work on it.
I'm trying my hardest to fix my flaws, and while I'm at it, learn to let go. Succumbing to my human frailties and the temptations of everyday life, is almost too easy. Learning to self control and walk away from all of this, is not going to be as easy, but I have mistakes I need to learn from. Half of these mistakes, I'm not the least bit proud of, but the bigger mistake, would have been not to make the mistake, so no, I will not allow myself to regret them, no matter how bruised I was after, or how many scars it has left. These mistakes, have shown me that I need to be more careful, in the sense that I need to learn where to place my heart, when to turn my emotions off and let my mind do the work, and when I need to tell myself to walk away from from the temptations of modern society.
All of these modern temptations have such a pull to them, that sometimes I'm not even sure I'll make it out.
Building up that wall was either the smartest thing I ever did or the stupidest. It never really did save me from much, seeing as I always let my guard down.
I guess you could call it a front. Denial, if you must, coming as naturally as a sneeze.

Random thoughts of the day;

• I haven't thought about you all day.
• I actually miss Araff. (: You hear that, boy ?
• I do not like getting calls in the middle of the night, disrupting my sleep. LEAVE ME ALOOOOOONE.
• I've got this craving for Idontknowwhat. I just have this feeling like I need something. It's either that, or I forgot to do something.
• I want Megan Fox. Damn.
• I haven't listened to So Contagious in a looong time.
• I'm confused and tired of being tossed about like this. I don't know what to feel anymore, and I just don't dig that.
• I love Seventh Day Slumber.

;; Anyplace is better,
Starting from zero got nothing to lose,
Maybe we'll make something,
But me myself I got nothing to prove.